Very, Very Rushed Scrawlings
Heavens forfend that I put off blogging any longer! To be honest, I only said that because I really wanted to use 'heaven's forfend' in a sentence.
Oh gosh. I've been gone for over a month. Spring Break has come and gone without so much as a peep or comment from me. What did I do over spring break? I went to the zoo, got water ice, went to the mall, and lazed. I lazed a rather lot. I am, as one might say, lazy. Did I do work? Certainly not! Did I take advantage of the predominately lovely weather? Certainly not! Did I really do anything at all, except what I mentioned? Don't be preposterous!
Boys Boys Boys
I am in a pickle! I have also always wanted to say "I am in a pickle". Next on my list is "I am surprised at you!".
Oh, where was I? Right! I am in a pickle and it involves the opposite gender. Admittedly, it's not so much of a pickle as a bunch of people standing around staring at each other (metaphorically, at least). See, one of my friends, China, who I met at a Model UN conference, has asked me to his prom! He says as friends, but I'm pretty sure he "likes" me. I mean especially since he also asked me out. We talk a lot and most of our conversation is obnoxiously flirty, and although I thought it was too obnoxious to be taken seriously, apparently he didn't think so. I felt bad for leading him, so I didn't exactly say yes or no! I told him my parents forbade me from dating till I'm sixteen, so we're not actually dating, but we still have a "thing". Gosh, I don't know how to explain this properly. We're not boyfriend and girlfriend, but I'd still feel guilty for, I don't know, running off with someone else.
Of course this is where the pickle comes in. This pickle is also a junior (like China) and his name is Zack. I met this pickle about two weeks ago whilst bowling with Joy, her boyfriend, and her boyfriend's friends. I've been texting him a lot...for a majority of the past two weeks, I'd say. And I do not like him. None of my friends believe me, but I do not have a crush on him or anything! I'm unsure about how I feel about him, to be honest, because we haven't known each other very long and I feel like I could like him, potentially, but I don't right now. Okay, I like him a smidge. Nothing serious! If he asked me out and I didn't have anything else going on and no restrictions, then I might say yes just to see where it goes.
The problem is, I do have other things going on. China is going on. I like China, but I don't really think I want to date him, even when I'm sixteen. I'm just already in a "thing" with him, so now I just feel guilty about texting Zack all the time and being so friendly with him, especially since I've told him all these doubts about China.
I'm also frustrated with Zack, because we keep circling the drain in regards to whether I like him or he likes me or whatever. He also became much friendlier with me after I told him about China. The whole situation is just weird and abstract and nothing is really going on, but it still bothers me with the inabsolution of it.
Most of my friends agree I should tell China how I feel or ask Zack how he feels, and while certainly that would make the situation a bit more straightforward, I know I won't be able to do either. So I guess it'll all just be weird a bit longer.
Chemistry is a Bit of a Whore
I mean that with hatred and contempt.
I have to retake a test I got nearly every question wrong on and do a lab report with the same subject as the test.
It makes me frustrated just thinking about it.
After a Month, Is the Bulk of What I Have to Talk About Still Guys?