Thursday, July 2, 2009

Frustrating ass.

[Wake Up Call--Maroon 5]
Pardon my language, my more sensitive friends.
I would be, of course, referring to Basil. He called me bitchy. Yes, you read right. Bitchy. Like he's one to talk!
Aaron (his status): hmmmm twll me if i should upload some pics of me when i was in 3-4 grade?
Me: Ew, who wants to see pictures of you?
Aaron: hmph.
Me: Haha. Get me something from Hong Kong!
Aaron: stop begging
This is where it gets ugly.
Basil: wow *strawberry* that was so bitchy...
Nat suggested I say: Fuck off. I wasn't talking to you. But heck, I couldn't do that even if I wanted to. So instead I respond with a much watered down:
Me: Excuse me? Um, sorry, but was I talking to you?
We (well, me) were all prepared with a bunch of awesome comebacks, but he decided to ruin the fun.
Basil: watevs.
Oh wells. Nat said she'd comment when she got to Tennerset (haha I just made up a name! No. It's Tennessee. Have at her, stalkers!), which will hopefully reignite the battle of wits that loomed so close on the horizon.
Whenever I sign on, I'm practically praying he comments on my status or something, but it never ends well. He thinks I'm a bitch with anger management issues. Well, I'm not a bitch. Take what you will from that.
[Desolation Row--My Chemical Romance]
I could so destroy him if it came to a battle. He cares less and he has more friends, but I could so destroy him. Argh! Stupid Basil!
Holy crap, I was just reading old entries! I really am a bitch when I'm mad...
[The Hand That Feeds--Nine Inch Nails]
So. I think the Blogs of Note thing is a load of crap. Who decides? What do they base it on? I looked at about ten of those and did not see a single blog I found worthy of coming back to. It wasn't interesting. Adults don't know how to be interesting. They can't write well at all. I know plenty of blogs who deserve that award, but they won't get it. Why? They're not well-known and they're run by teenagers. Pssht, down with the system!
I got the cutest shoes ever!!! They're, like, blue flipflops about an inch of the ground. And they were only nine bucks!
[Id Engager--Of Montreal]
I paid them off by cleaning out my mom's car. Eh. So worth it. I never did get a haircut, though...
Hmm. That was rather unrelated.
I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF! I finally started rewriting the Willow story again. I lost track of the real story and filled it with useless, confusing fluff the first time, but no more! Here's what I have so far:
It was the kind of night Willow’s mother would have loved. New York City was a solid black mass against the pink, then orange, then purple, then blue of the eight o’clock sunset. The air was cold, too cold for flying. Willow, a tiny dot against the rapidly darkening sky, swooped down in a graceful ark and alighted on the first tall building she saw: the Empire State Building.
There she wrapped her crystal-like tan-speckled-with-white wings around herself in an effort to keep warm. This was why she hated winter so much; it got so cold, and it got cold so much faster. She had spent so many nights exactly like this; shivering, terrified, and alone. For seven years she had been trying to survive like this. Ever since she was eight, ever since—she couldn’t think it. She shook back the pain and the memories and closed her eyes. If only she could fall asleep…
Of course, as it always was in large cities, that was impossible. New York was winding down, surrendering to the blanket of night that surrounded them, and yet there was still so much heartache. Mentally, Willow cursed her gift. Her mother could do great things with the Forbidden Magic, but she had been killed before she could teach Willow anything. Now she was stuck with the power she had been born with: to feel the emotion of anyone within a five-mile radius, to absorb their pain as well as their happiness. The most prominent feeling was always sadness, despair, desolation, and without training, Willow could not escape it.
She tucked her head into her wings as well, her tawny brown/blonde hair falling over the outside. Inside her pale cocoon, the tears fell freely. It was so unfair. It was nights like these she craved her mother the most, prayed for her gentle embrace and her soothing voice whisking her tears away, her melodious singing and beautiful smile. Her mother could take away the constant onslaught of pain, could teach Willow how to be strong like her. She was fifteen, but she felt like an eight-year-old again.
Willow shuddered, for an instant picturing the pain in her mother’s eyes as her wings were torn off and her neck was snapped. She could do nothing to save her. No one could. To save her, her mother had forfeited her own life.
It wasn’t worth it.
When finally it was too cold to bear, Willow fell asleep. The numbness took over and she began to dream…dream of that night almost exactly seven years ago.
Willow’s mother set the plate in front of her, smiling. Willow had just lifted her fork when the first scream was heard.
Almost instantly, her mother raced out the door, the little girl following. The mother screamed for her daughter to go back inside when a man punched her, knocking her to the ground. Willow, confused, looked up.
She recognized the man instantly. Leo Ronaldines. Her father, arrested years ago for treason against the royal family. He glowered at her with bloodthirsty eyes.
“Papa,” she whispered, holding out a trembling hand to him.
The man was knocked back suddenly. Willow’s mother screamed, with a violent force the eight-year-old had never heard before, “Stay away from my daughter, you monster!”
Urgently, oblivious to the situation, Willow cried, “Mama, that was papa!”
The mother stared at her daughter in shock, as if she could not believe the tiny girl didn’t know what was going on. The Conspiracy’s were everywhere, killing everyone who tried to fly or fight, setting fire to everything. Screams filled the air and blood painted the town. And yet Willow was only concerned with seeing her father…the leader of the Conspiracy’s…
In her sleep, Willow shuddered violently. She longed to escape this nightmare, but it was sucking her in.
One of the Conspiracy’s grabbed Willow, who instinctively began to attack the man. It was no use…jail had made them hard and strong, impossible for a weak, young eight-year-old to beat.
Willow screamed for her mother, whose eyes were blazing as more Conspiracy’s surrounded them. The traitors knew who these two were; Leo had ordered them to be killed no matter what.
“Close your eyes, Willow!” her mother screamed, but the little girl didn’t. She saw the monstrous lightning erupt from her mother’s fingertips, striking through the Conspiracy’s that surrounded them. They collapsed to the ground. The mother turned and locked eyes with her daughter, who was gaping at her, shocked.
“Run, Willow,” she whispered softly. The Conspiracy that had held the girl was dead as well, his arms completely burned off. Willow could see pain in her mother’s eyes and didn’t move.
Moments later, her mother fell to the ground, writhing in pain. The Forbidden Magic was consuming her. She needed hours to rest after using it to such an extent, but now she didn’t have hours. The Conspiracy’s were closing in.
Willow ran to her mother, tears streaming down her face. She already knew her mother would die. But Willow had the Magic too. Couldn’t she save her?
“Mama,” she whispered. “Mama, I’ll help you.”
“You have to run!” the woman shrieked, in too much pain to try and hide it from her daughter. Willow swallowed, feeling the image of her mother dying being branded onto her brain.
A Conspiracy grabbed her.
Still more surrounded her mother. They grabbed her off the ground, tore off her lovely midnight blue wings. Willow watched the blood drip from the severed wing with too-wide eyes. She heard her mother scream like there was no greater pain in the world.
The mother looked up; saw the fear in her daughter’s eyes, and nothing else. She could feel her daughter’s pain, her terror. She felt nothing else. Only one thought crossed her mind: Willow must live.
With the last bit of energy left in her, she shot her lightning through the Conspiracy that imprisoned her daughter. Almost instantly the Conspiracy holding her bent her head at a ninety-degree-angle, instantly killing her. Now Willow knew what to do. She leapt into the air, unfurling her wings, and took off with the speed of a jet.
Every fairy in Ganea saw her escape, and everyone froze, the Conspiracy’s and the civilians. They watched her shrink and shrink till she was just a dot in the sky. They watched her disappear.
A single tear fell from the sky and landed on her dead mother’s horrified face.

Willow woke up with her face drenched in tears. As if watching her mother be brutally killed once wasn’t enough. As if seeing the home she loved, Ganea, fall to destruction wasn’t enough. As if seeing her father, with such hate in his eyes, destroy everything she held dear wasn’t enough.
Hate surged through her as she thought of Leo. He was a monster, a villain beyond description. Her life’s mission, from the moment she escaped into the human world, was to find him and kill him.
But she couldn’t bring herself to go back to Ganea, and she knew she wouldn’t be able to bring herself to kill Leo, no matter how evil he was. She knew she was powerful enough to, but her mother wouldn’t have wanted it. The only time her mother hurt a fly was when her beloved daughter was in danger.
The dream, though, ignited a new anger within her, a hate to such extent she had never felt before. She wanted someone to die for what the world had done to her, her mother. She wanted Leo to suffer.
With a ferocious hate boiling just under the surface, Willow took off.
She couldn’t even think of someone seeing her on the streets below. Nothing was going to slow her down, not this time. She knew exactly how to get to Ganea from the human world, and it was not a long trip. It was the same path she had taken when she escaped Ganea all those years ago.
Willow could fly extremely fast. The Appalachians were in sight within two minutes. Without hesitating, she dove straight for them, watching the rock speed towards her with grim expectation.
She exploded into the mountain, but there was no pain, no sound, no change. The gray/brown stone slid effortlessly into a slate-gray sky and the otherworldly feeling of being entirely encased in rock was replaced with the chilling feeling of flying through cold, dusky air.
It was quiet below. The entire of Ganea was dark and despondent…not like the world she once knew. The once silver trees that stood throughout the countryside were black and broken and dead, the once blue skies were dark gray with swirling clouds. The entire land was deathly still and silent. The city also looked dead, once beautiful homes, temples, and stables were now in ruin or burned down, and Willow wondered how the fairies lived there.
Why couldn’t they just fly away, though? Why couldn’t they simply spread their wings and fly away? She went down at a slight angle, searching for an answer.
A loud, shocking cry shattered the eerie silence, almost sending Willow plummeting to the ground. Her eyes instantly went to the source of the noise.
A large, heavily-built man was towering over a small child, holding a grotesquely familiar contraption with gleaming blades. The child looked about three…just old enough to fly. The realization dawned on Willow slowly.
She stared at the scene in shock. The man wrenched when of the child’s wings away from it’s back and set the tip of the brown, feathery wing in between the blades. She couldn’t bear to look, but she heard very clearly the child’s bitter cries as the Conspiracy clipped the tips of it’s wings. The noise made her stomach churn. It wouldn’t be long…
Pain shot through her, the same pain that the child was feeling. Pain was coming from all around…every fairy in Ganea was heartbroken. It was overwhelming. It numbed her devastating fury at the same time it fueled it.
Leo would pay for this.
The gleaming white castle (called the Château Blanc) that once housed the royal family of Ganea now glowed with a shadowy light. There were no guards, and why would there be? Leo had nothing to fear. No one would dare take a stand against him. Willow aimed herself towards a window on what might have been the third floor and entered the castle with no difficulty.
The hallways of the castle were nearly twenty feet wide and at least twenty feet high. Willow took a moment to examine the pearly white marble that made up every tile on the ceiling and the floor of the Château Blanc. She had never been inside before; it was breathtaking. The hallway snaked in a circle around the main hall, rising up till they reached the top. A black iron gate kept anyone from falling off (as if that were possible) and intricate columns lined the edge.
Voices interrupted the dead silence in the castle; Willow knew immediately that one of them was Leo’s. She felt anger pierce through her, and it was not only from her hatred of her father. She ducked behind a column.
“I am done with your failures,” Leo hissed, his footsteps heavy against the marble. “For seven years we have spent every resource in finding her! Yet your searches and studies turn up nothing.”
“Please, sir,” a much quieter voice pleaded. “We get leads, but she moves too quickly. She never stays in one place more than a night. She has no contact with anyone, so finding clues to where she’s going is nearly impossible.”
Leo was silent for a moment, considering. Then he spoke, “As long as she lives she is a threat to our order.” Leo and the second man were now rounding the corner, where Willow could see them. She tried to make herself as small as possible behind the column, not sure what to do if she was caught. She knew they must be talking about her…and here she was, only a few feet away from the man trying to kill her.
She wondered for a moment if she could use the Forbidden Magic to make herself invisible, but quickly dismissed the idea. The Magic had drained the life out of her mother, who was highly trained. What could it do to her?
“But…” The other man seemed hesitant. “But, sir…why is she a threat? She never once made a move to suggest she would come to Ganea to defeat you. She’s never done anything threatening or suspicious.”
Leo stopped walking, and the other man did quickly after him. They were out of Willow’s line of vision, and she wouldn’t risk moving to look at them.
“You do not know what she is capable of.” Leo’s voice was low, angry. The other man swallowed. Willow could only guess what her father’s face looked like. For a moment, she felt bad for the unknown man.
It was time. She stepped out from behind the column. Leo and the other man immediately turned to stare at her.
“Who are you?” the other one sputtered, his face red. “You can’t be in here!”
The weak one didn’t even know who she was, but Leo did. Their eyes locked. They had the exact same eyes.
“You killed my mother,” she whispered softly, though rage boiled inside.
He didn’t speak. He only stared at her, his face stone, his eyes cold. He wanted so badly to kill her…but now that she was right in front of him, he was frozen. She wore the same expression he did.
“You killed your wife,” Willow continued, her eyes narrowing.
Pain racked Leo’s body, but he did not show it. His wife…his beloved Emaline…it was cruel that she and his daughter were the only ones who absolutely had to die. They were the only one who could possibly stop him from his master plan.
“Oh, God…” the other man gasped. “Is…is it her? It’s her! Willow!”
“Shut up,” she hissed at him. “Shut up, shut up. Don’t ever say my name!”
It wasn’t so much him saying her name that bothered her, but surely, by now, someone would’ve overheard them. She could hear the footsteps of Leo’s guards pounding up the smooth marble hall. Some were flying.
They appeared the same way Leo and the other man had, but this time Willow was prepared. She froze them with a single look, some in mid-air. She could feel the power coursing through her, making her fingers tingle.
“You killed your wife.” she repeated. Leo’s eyes tightened at the corners.
“I was never married.” he hissed.
The fury was too much. Willow screamed wordlessly, pushing all the pain into him. He cried out from shock, doubling over. Despite herself, Willow smiled cruelly at his pain.
He was silent, but angry. Furious. But Willow was madder. She was losing control of herself. She could feel the pain and anger and fear of every living soul, and it was torturing her. And their pain was his fault.
She stretched out her hand violently, without realizing what was happening. The guards looked on with terrified expressions, still frozen, unable to fight back. Willow could feel power draining from every part of her and shooting out of her finger tips. Lightning was everywhere. The black, ink-like lightning from her fingers, striking them every Conspiracy, just as her mother’s had. Her mother had collapsed from the power of the Forbidden Magic, but Willow was not collapsing. She was enjoying the power, feeding off of it.
There was a flash of light and a ferocious roar. The lightning froze where it was, as if it were solid. Inside, Willow panicked. What was happening? What was wrong?
Gleaming black scales coating the outside of the lightning. Leo screamed, but it was drawn out, like the world was in slow motion. The lightning seemed to concentrate inside the inky scales, still glowing with ferocious light.
If you make it through all that, congratulations. Menace (the dragon) is about to born from the lightning. I'm probably gonna change his name, but whatever.
I don't really like the entire scene with Willow killing everyone. I want it to be extremely powerful, because it's really a huge turning point. I mean, she just used the Forbidden Magic to kill people, which is kinda the reason it was forbidden in the first place. It's unstable. She's unstable, really. Since she's untrained, it only comes to her in times of extreme emotion, which is never good. She was so filled with hate for these people, so bitter about her mother being killed and her life pretty much going to hell, that she used the magic she couldn't control to kill them. That's some deep rage right there. Eh. It's hard to make things powerful in third person. I'm much more of a first-y writer. I just don't think I have the skill to portray what was going on in her head throughout that part of the book.
There are seven main characters, though some of them aren't introduced till later in the book:
Willow- Willow was orphaned at eight by the evil group of fairies called Conspiracy's. She is extremely powerful, gifted with the Magic that runs through her family. She has issues with self-doubt and trust, and is constantly confused because she doesn't want to be the only one who can save Ganea. She's emotionally, and oftentimes mentally, unstable. She's in constant pain, which fills her constantly with a bitter rage for anyone who ever wronged her. She is usually either depressed or angry, but is feircely loyal and hasn't yet forgotten how to laugh.
Aden- Best friends with Willow since birth, Aden possesses no Magic but has ulta-fine-tuned senses. He is strong, highly intelligent, but has a blurred sense of right and wrong. Aden is particularly self-centered, doing whatever it takes to survive no matter what cost, which causes him to accept Leo's offer to work for the Conspiracy's and hunt down Willow. Willow and Aden are reuinted early in the book, and under the spotlight of Willow's faltering trust, Aden joins her mission to stop the Conspiracy's along with his dragon, Gemini (who later dies, by the way). Fairly soon he rekindles an old flame for Willow, which pretty much swings his views in a full circle. Now he's only concerned with protecting her and keeping her from the pain he knows she must be feeling, but he still retains valuable information from her and due to a serious character flaw, ends up betraying her again, this time unforgivingly.
Leo- Leo is Willow's father and the leader of the Conspiracy's. Much like Aden, he will do whatever it takes to survive, even if that means killing his wife and daughter, since they are the only ones who can stop him from his master plan. Willow, of course, escapes (you read that), and he throws himself completely into finding her and killing her, which drives him slightly mad. In the beginning, Leo seems tough, evil, and unforgiving, but deep down he is weak and confused. He regrets his sins but in order to keep control, he cannot admit any weakness. He's an extremely fearful man, but he loved his wife and he can't kill his daughter.
Roni- Roni is the only human main character. After nursing Willow back to health after a freak accident, they quickly become best friends. Roni is a little too brave, but loyal and strong. She longs to help Willow in her quest to save the world, but just can't move at the same pace. She's much more positive than Willow but underneath has a terribly sad soul.
Menace (to be renamed)- Menace is the dragon Willow accidently created with the Forbidden Magic. Annoyingly and infinitely wise, he constantly gives advice (usually when it's not wanted) and always seems to hold back when Willow's on her last nerve. He loves Willow like a younger sister and extremely protective of her, but usually trusts her judgement. He is bound to Willow, much like Aden is bound to Gemini, but for different reasons. He's a constant friend to Willow throughout the entire book and never gets angry at her, though he never trusts Aden.
Ilai- Ilai is Willow's long-lost fraternal twin. Seperated at birth, she grew up completely seperate from the Conspiracy's and Ganea. She lived with a kind family who accepted her obscene power and did their best to teach her how to control it. Endlessly calm and patient, Ilai is almost the exact opposite of Willow. She's entirely commited to stopping the Conspiracy's, especially after they kill her adopted family searching for her. Ilai is entirely collected and practically reeks of control, and at the beginning of their relationship she treats Willow more like a younger sister than an equal. Towards the end, though, her weakness is unveiled: she wants desperately to be accepted by Willow and be part of the family. She is often jealous of Roni for being so close to Willow.
Elize- Elize is the beautiful, mysterious (and immortal) Watcher of an ancient library. She guides the band trying to stop the Conspiracy's for a little while, but it is discovered (too late) that she is evil. She was imprisoned in the library by the Queen (of Ganea) of her time after going on a massive killing spree. Elize is not related to Willow in any way, but she is incredibly powerful. She gave the Conspiracy's their power and had been guiding Leo to commit his crimes. There isn't a battle between her and Willow till (oopsie!) Elize kills Aden, which pretty much turns Willow into a completely enraged psycho.
I don't like the ending I had for the first version, so now I don't know how it should end.


  1. yeah. I am trying to write a story, tho i tend to start then stop. the one i am working on i have about ten pages. I also have another that i posted that i had to write for history class but went a little overboard with. and i think i am too my biggest critic. it's normal... i think....

  2. well we were given a painting by Jacob Lawrence and we had to write a slavery escape piece based on that picture. Mine was "through the forest"

  3. and just fyi, you are now my favorite person at the time being because you love the Hunger Games. I would probably erase my memory just to read it again like the first time.